Saturday, August 16, 2008

Lessons from Mrs. Puchini: Walk the Line

From time to time, I will be writing stories about some of my teachers. They thought they were patients or clients, but I'm not sure who was more helpful to whom! In all of my stories, I am changing some of the following: their names, genders, ages, references to time period when we hung out together, and any potentially identifying information... just so you know...
Mrs. Puchini was a tiny elderly woman who always wore a housedress with a tiny white fringe of petticoat showing above her stick figure legs (Think flamingoes!) She loved to get up on a very tall ladder which was constructed during the year of her birth. As I approached her tiny little house, I walked along her side yard fence. Of course, since she and her family were small statured, so was the fence... 
Imagine my first sighting of Mrs. Puchini... Amid a little orchard of giant prune trees stood a lone rickety ladder, leaning up against one of the trees.  On the ladder's tallest step perched two little pink house shoes (slippers), with tiny white socks up to the ankles of these skinny little legs, topped off with a wisp of petticoat and a partial view of a pink housedress. Visually, 75% of her human form was apparently up in the middle of the prune tree, which was heavy with fruit. After I had rang her doorbell and knocked on the door for awhile, calling her name, the front door opened and Mrs. Puchini peered out with a big smile. She invited me inside. 
During our 30 minute visit, we eventually got to the discussion about her safety in her home, particularly dealing with her stove, her throw rugs (AKA flying carpets) and the importance of staying off stools and ladders (smooth segue!) Her big blue eyes grew wide and never flickered as she told me that she NEVER got on stools or ladders. She went so far as to put her hand on her tiny chest and assured me that she never would, now that I had asked her not to... Note the clinical and ethical dilemmas... 
For quite a number of years, Mrs. Puchini and I repeated this same conversation, every week or two. I never "confronted her"... I just helped take care of her, where she was, as she was... and tried not to let her know that I knew. That would have hurt her feelings. That would also have prevented me from being able to do the rest of my job. Every visit, she would hug me goodbye and wave from her doorway. Mrs. Puchini taught me a lot about respect, creativity, patience, compassion and a few tips on the strategy about how to walk that fine line between being a "healer" and being a guest. I continue to practice walking that fine line, every day. 
Years later, I heard that Mrs. Puchini had recently died peacefully in her sleep, in her own tiny little house. No ladders or stools were implicated.

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